Weddings

weddings

Why have a humanist wedding? Because you deserve it.

“Your wedding, your way” is the phrase which sums it up.

You can have your ceremony where you want it, when you want it, and in the style which suits you. That might be completely traditional or breaking new ground.

My ceremonies are Humanist or non-religious. They are also centred on you and your story, so they are completely personalised and meaningful. A Humanist wedding is based on your thoughts, your stories, and your hopes for the future.

You can have it in a place which is important to you – your family garden, the place where the proposal happened, a nature reserve, an arts venue, anywhere. Which means you don’t have to have the expense of booking a registered venue or fitting in with a one-size fits all package.

A humanist wedding allows you to share the story of your love with those who mean most to you.

What might a ceremony be like?

A typical ceremony might contain any or all of the following elements:
- the story of how you met, how you feel about each other, and your hopes for the future;
- your commitments and promises to each other;
- the exchange of rings, and the speaking of vows;
- readings of prose or poetry which is important to you. This can be done by yourselves, by family and friends, or by me as celebrant;
- music, either recorded or live, chosen because it means something to both of you;
- various symbolic acts, like lighting candles, or “handfasting” (an ancient tradition from which the term “tying the knot” comes). Your could ask your guests to “warm” your rings with their hopes for you. Or you can do anything else which is meaningful for you.;
- the active involvement of the guests in whatever you – or they – want
How would I work with you?

I can give you advice on all these elements, sharing examples of how other couples have approached their ceremonies. But in the end, we will be creating something entirely new. I can suggest creative ways to make your ceremony special. Perhaps it’s about the use of the space. Or maybe it’s about using words or themes which are special to you in the ceremony. I can help you to find readings. Sometimes, if you talk to me early enough in your planning, I can help you find venues and other suppliers.

My Fees

My standard fee for a wedding is £750 within a 50 mile radius of my home in East Sussex, payable in 3 instalments. If this is a barrier for you, please do talk to me about it and we’ll see if I can bring the cost down at all.

Next Steps

If you are interested in having me conduct your wedding ceremony, see the ‘about me’ page for details – https://www.felicityharvestcelebrant.co.uk/about-me/. If you like what I can offer and want to make a commitment to using me, we would set up a longer meeting. Then I can find out more about you, and what kind of ceremony you want. I would then develop a script as the basis for making amendments and developing ideas, until it is just right. I’d recommend a rehearsal the night before if at all possible. And of course, I’d conduct the ceremony on the day and give you a copy afterwards to keep.

Remember – it’s your wedding – make sure you do it your way!

Verity and Andy’s wedding cake – their wedding cake, their way!

Legal recognition

As humanist ceremonies are not yet legally recognised in England, in order for your wedding or civil partnership to be legally recognised you would need to have a civil ceremony. In my own case, we made a virtue out of necessity. We had a small register office ceremony in the Midlands near to elderly family members who would not have wanted to travel. Then we had a humanist ceremony combined with a party in the function room of a restaurant on the beach in Brighton. Humanist weddings are legally recognised in Scotland, Northern Ireland, Guernsey, Jersey, the Republic of Ireland and many other countries around the world. We are hopeful that they will be in England and Wales soon too.

We wanted to say a massive thank you for everything you did to make our wedding ceremony so perfect. Very early on in the planning stages someone said, take the time to make your service personal as that’s what people remember of the day and it was so very true. We were overwhelmed with the number of people who said it was one of the nicest services they has been to in their lives. For us, it had the right amount of solemnity, laughs and the personal element. Your delivery was spot on, and we really appreciate the time you gave us.

Chris and Vicky
I wanted to write to say how special the ceremony was on Saturday. Many many people have contacted me to say they have never been at such a special event, I think my entire family (and there are lots of them) were in tears and will never forget this experience. Thank you from my heart for all your work and attention to detail in making their ceremony so personal and wonderful – beautiful, thoughtful and funny in turns.

Jennifer Rogers
The service was more than I could have imagined, the quotes, the way you presented it and told our story and the spock quote in particular was amazing. We couldnt have asked for anything more.

Carlos (speaking about his & Charlotte’s Star Trek infused wedding)
We just wanted to thank you again for all you did to make our ceremony so special. All our guests mentioned how ‘us’ the ceremony was, and how lovely the celebration was. We were thrilled with how it all turned out and are feeling very lucky to have had such a perfect day, and such a brilliant celebrant! So many of the real gems of the day – the themes, seed-giving and crockery smashing, came about through your guidance. So a big thank you!

A thank you from Seb and Kirsten

Please click through the slides below to see some examples of ceremonies which I have performed.

Sarah and Nick’s handfasting. Their hands were bound together and they made their promises to each other. After that, they could drop the ribbons, because now they needed no ribbons, they were bound together by their promises. The custom of hand fasting gave rise to the phrase ‘tying the knot’.

“We’d like to say a great thank you to Felicity for sharing our special day with us as our Humanist Celebrant. The blessing was just magical and our guests said it was the most romantic they’d been to. Additionally it has changed the minds of my many ‘marriage isn’t for me’ friends, by showing them how personal and relaxed a humanist wedding can be” – Sabrina and Matt

If it’s at all possible, I recommend a rehearsal – often in the venue the evening before when the key players have arrived. It means that everyone can practice in the space and we can work out how to get round any logistical issues. This is a rare photo of a rehearsal, because unusually the official photographer came along to get a preview.

“It was a joy to see you in action – what a gift you have!” – Wendy, the groom’s grandmother

We would just like to thank you again for such a wonderful ceremony, we are absolutely over the moon with how it went. I cannot tell you the number of people that commented on how much they enjoyed that part of the day. They loved the intimacy and personal nature of the service and thought you did a great job. We can’t thank you enough for making it even more special than we could have imagined, I am so happy we found you! Olivia and Josef

Sometimes those contributing to a wedding are overcome with emotion – either bursting into tears or, as in this case, being overwhelmed with giggles. At a humanist ceremony, though, the atmosphere is relaxed and people feel able to let go without embarrassment.

Brittany was from the States, Will was from Kent. Their mothers brought little phials of sand from each location to the wedding, and these were mixed together at the ceremony, symbolising the merging of the two families and cultures.

We want to say a heartfelt and resounding thank you, for your work in planning, organising and conducting our beautiful ceremony of marriage under the poplars. You were supportive and creative during the initial phase, and embedded our ideas smoothly. The final ceremony felt just right – it was deeply personal to our journey together, and full of warmth just as we’d asked. All of our family and friends felt part of that circle, both literally and emotionally, and you helped to build a spirit of community and togetherness in the field that has stayed with us, and all who were there, as treasured memories. Countless people have told us it was one of the most moving weddings they have ever attended, and we would like you know how very grateful we are to you for helping it to be so very special. Lou and Mikey

Kathy and Peter are both keen bikers – they met when they were neighbours, and started to borrow each other’s tools over the fence. So they left the ceremony in style. In other weddings, I’ve also had the groom arrive on a horse, the couple leave in a boat, and on one occasion we all stripped down to our swimmies at the end of the ceremony and jumped in the sea. More conventional arrivals and departures are also quite acceptable, though – the point is that the wedding is designed with you and for you.

Here are Chris and Vicky. Over the next few years, I did naming ceremonies for all three of their sons. It’s always a real pleasure to work with a family more than once and to see their stories develop.

Kerry and Michael married on a beach on a Greek island – here they are exchanging rings, with Kerry’s son looking on. They married at dawn, and included a number of both Greek and German inspired elements in their wedding. This was the wedding which was immediately followed by a swim.

We had so many lovely comments about how fantastic you were and the service itself. Both Rom and I are very pleased we went with you for our big day as you made it so very, very special. It’s a day we will never forget and you are a big part of that. Thank you again, Mr & Mrs H (Emma and Rom)

Chrissy and Andy make their living running a shop at music festivals, so many of their closest friends are people who work at festivals. They got married at the Over the Moon Festival near Hailsham – I had to be signed in as crew to do the rehearsal and then the ceremony.

Felicity was such a lovely person to celebrate with – she cared about our story and made it a real part of the ceremony. She listened to what we wanted and was very understanding even when we were very tardy with our responses! I loved having her conduct our ceremony – I feel we were very lucky to have her, and so many people told us what a lovely and personal service it was. I would recommend her to anyone. Becca and Joel

If what you’ve seen here interests you, do ring me on 01892 783226, email me at felicity.harvest@humanistceremonies.org.uk . Look at my Facebook page Humanist Harvest for more recent images and feedback https://www.facebook.com/Humanist-Harvest-250995834915695, or follow me on Instagram as felicityharvestcelebrant: https://www.instagram.com/felicityharvestcelebrant/

Why have a humanist wedding? Because you deserve it.

A humanist wedding allows you to share the story of your love with those who mean most to you.

What might a ceremony be like?

How would I work with you?

My Fees

Next Steps

Remember – it’s your wedding – make sure you do it your way!

Legal recognition